Just the everyday thoughts and observations from a nebraska woman.
by George Carlin
Published on May 24, 2005 By Nebraskawoman In Humor
{I got this in an email today and Thought I needed to share it. I am a BAD American. Are you?}

YES, I'M A BAD AMERICAN
by George Carlin

I Am Your Worst Nightmare. I am a BAD American. I am George Carlin.

I believe the money I make belongs to me and my family, not some mid level governmental functionary be it Democratic or Republican!

I'm in touch with my feelings and I like it that way, damn it!

I think owning a gun doesn't make you a killer, it makes you a smart American.

I think being a minority does not make you noble or victimized, and does not entitle you to anything.

I believe that if you are selling me a Big Mac, try to do it in English.

I think fireworks should be legal on the 4th of July.

I think that being a student doesn't give you any more enlightenment than working at Blockbuster. In fact, if your parents are footing the bill to put your pansy ass through 4 years plus of college, you haven't begun to be enlightened.

I believe everyone has a right to pray to his or her God when and where they want to.

My heroes are John Wayne, Babe Ruth, Roy Rogers, and whoever canceled Jerry Springer.

I don't hate the rich. I don't pity the poor.

I know wrestling is fake and I don't waste my time arguing about it.

I think global warming is a big lie. Where are all those experts now, when I'm freezing my ass off during these long winters and paying, paying, paying?

I've never owned a slave, or was a slave, I didn't wander forty years In the desert after getting chased out of Egypt. I haven't burned any witches or been persecuted by the Turks and neither have you! So, shut-the-Hell-up already.

I want to know which church is it exactly where the Reverend Jesse Jackson practices, where he gets his money, and why he is always part of the problem and not the solution. Can I get an AMEN on that one?

I think the cops have every right to shoot your sorry ass if you're running from them.

I also think they have the right to pull your ass over if you're breaking the law, regardless of what color you are.

And, no, I don't mind having my face shown on my drivers license. I think it's good.....and I'm proud that "God" is written on my money.

I think if you are too stupid to know how a ballot works, I don't want you deciding who should be running the most powerful nation in the world for the next four years.

I dislike those people standing in the intersections trying to sell me crap or trying to guilt me into making "donations" to their cause. These people should be targets.

I believe that it doesn't take a village to raise a child, it takes two parents.

And what the hell is going on with gas prices... again?

If this makes me a BAD American, then yes, I'm a BAD American.

If you are a BAD American too, please forward this to everyone you know.

We need our country back


Comments
on May 24, 2005
uh ohhhhhh LOOKS like I am a bad american too.. oh worry oh worry worry..
on May 24, 2005
Uh...I hate to break the bad news, but Carlin didn't do this one... Link

But it's still cool!
on May 24, 2005
'I think the cops have every right to shoot your sorry ass if you're running from them.'
Hmm, interesting. No threat (they're running away, right?), innocent until proven guilty, possibly just frightened ... irrelevant detail. Just gun 'em down, Judge Dredd! Dead men / women / children tell no tales, eh? Glad I don't live in 'bad America'!
on May 25, 2005
I am a bad American as well.
on May 25, 2005
Hmm, interesting. No threat (they're running away, right?), innocent until proven guilty, possibly just frightened ... irrelevant detail. Just gun 'em down, Judge Dredd! Dead men / women / children tell no tales, eh? Glad I don't live in 'bad America'!


If they're not guilty of anything, why are they afraid?

Shame on me.
on May 25, 2005
Bad American here.....
on May 26, 2005
Good American here.
on May 26, 2005
Ooops, another perfectly good E-mail inspired Urban Legend, down the drain! ;~D
on May 26, 2005
Who cares who wrote it honestly? I don't. I just posted it as I recieved it. I like it whoever wrote it. { And Furry, Why are they running if they are innocent?}